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My dadiji did a
lot of temple service and yet peace was far from her. This lack
of peace would reflect in her day to day life. I would get upset
quite often by her behavior. I could not understand why there
was no change in her life, what the truth was and who is God. I
was too young to understand all such complex things, I guess.
Our Troubles
I saw my mother
always sad and unhappy, struggling with life. Papa used to stay
in Delhi for his profession and yet he would also struggle for
some sort of better work. Some of his own close relative(s)
ditched him. This family who deceived us would still consider
themselves part of Gayatri family and do yagya etc.
Papa did not have good work (sometimes no work); therefore
everybody would consider us inferior and would treat us badly.
Mummy used to suffer a lot. After finishing household chores,
she would come back to room and weep for long times. She would
hug me and bhaiya (my elder brother) and cry profusely. She
would go for all Hindu saints etc in search of peace and
prosperity in our house. Her main objective was to get Papa a
stable work, but she would always come back miserable and with
failures. She would cry before idols for hours together, longing
for everything to just become alright by the grace of the gods
she was worshipping. Nothing happened. I would wonder whether
someone is really listening.
Papa used to come home every month or once in two months. Mummy
would always request him to take us along with him to Delhi.
Finally one day, Papa decided to take us to Delhi. In 1996, we
moved to Delhi and started living in a rented room. We faced
many difficulties there specially due to financial crisis. Few
of our relatives (Tau ji – elder brother of my father) also used
to live in Delhi; however, instead of helping, he would always
abuse and go back. This would disturb us even more.
New Beginnings
Due to
constant struggle, Papa-mummy started thinking of moving to
Jaipur. They thought that some work could be found in Jaipur as
well, but I was not at all prepared to go to Jaipur. I would cry
everyday and try to convince my parents to not move once again.
I would ask why this all was happening with us. Normally, they
would heed to whatever I say, but this time, they were not ready
to understand. They started preparing for moving.
My papa’s aunt used to live in Jaipur, so papa asked her to look
for a house for us on rent. We informed her that we were moving
to Jaipur forever. Mamiji (papa’s aunt) started searching the
house but she found none. Even if she found some, wherever she
gave advance money, they would return (for reasons known to them
alone) the money and say – we don’t want to let it out. Finally,
when it was only one day left for us to move, mamiji found a
house, and the house-owner generously agreed even on a sum less
then he was expecting as rent. He did not know whey he agreed on
a lesser amount. Now I know, God was working out his plan for
us.
Next day, we reached Jaipur with our entire luggage. We all were
sad and were apprehensive of our future (and the new place). We
had moved to Jaipur in year 2000. I stopped talking. Papa
started his struggle to find a stable work. I used to live upset
and therefore would frequently go to mamiji’s house.
One Friday evening, we heard some sound of singing songs from
our house owner (Arun Bhaiya’s room). We found the songs
soothing, so we just sat down and started listening to those
songs. We could hear some music instruments also being played
the songs being sung were very encouraging and full of hope. We
felt a strange peace within ourselves as we listened to those
songs. We almost forgot our pains and sufferings for a while.
Next day, mummy asked Arun Bhaiya’s wife (Vandana) about the
last night’s singing episode. She informed my mother that it was
a prayer meeting in their house. Couple of people from a nearby
church would come to their house every Friday to worship and
pray for some time with them. She informed that they all would
read Bible together and meditate upon it in this meeting. This
was all so new for us, but somehow we were happy by knowing
this. We asked her if we could also visit a church sometime.
Sister Vandana gladly replied saying, “Yes! Anyone can come to
the Church!”. We decided that we would also go and see the
church soon.
First visit to the Church
Bhaiya went
to the church with Arun Bhaiya once and after coming back,
excitedly he told us that it was a very good experience. He said
that he really like it. So, I also started asking Papa to take
me to the Church at least once. After lot of persistent pleas,
finally papa agreed to take me to the church soon.
11 November, 2000 was the Sunday when I went to church first
time in my life. I remember the date because it was my birthday.
As we were going to the Church, many things were going on in my
mind. I was expecting a big colonial building with a big cross
on the top, very peaceful environment inside. I was also
apprehensive of what to do inside, and how would people react
because we were Hindus. With all this in my mind, as we
approached near to the church, no colonial building was to be
seen, rather I started to hear similar but louder music from a
nearby house. As we came still nearer, we found a pretty average
sized house, full of greenery and a hall besides, out of which I
saw number of shoes and chappals scattered outside. We entered
the church and stood in the backside. We saw people praying for
each other. I could not understand much so I was just looking
around. Some people were praying in a language which I did not
understand at all.
After
church meeting, so many girls and ladies came to meet me. They
met me with so much of love and I did not even feel that it was
my first visit there. Pastor uncle gifted me a Bible. Now, I did
not know again what to do with this Bible and what to expect in
it. However, with this pleasant experience, I came back home and
told everything to mummy. I told her to go together to the
Church next Sunday as a family. Immediately after this, I opened
the Bible and started reading it. Truly speaking, I did not
understand many things, but one thing became very evident –
Jesus Christ came for the whole human race. He did not come only
for Christians, but he gave his life for every sinner as he died
on the cross. I also came to know that Jesus rose again from the
dead and has defeated death. Knowing this, my faith in Jesus
started growing.
My faith and blessings
I came to
know that Jesus Christ is alive and therefore whatever we pray,
he listens and answers. Knowing this, all doubts flee from my
heart and my heart was molded in such a way that whatever I read
in the Bible, I just believed in it instantly without any
questions or much thinking. Whatever I learnt about Jesus, I
started telling to my relatives as well. I thought that as I, my
mummy and bhaiya have believed in Jesus, they shall also do the
same.
I would speak to Papa for hours about Jesus. As he realized that
I was completely going for Jesus and have stopped idol worship,
he stopped me from going to Church. He started forcing us to do
idol worship as in Hindu traditional way to please God. I became
very sad and started praying with tears for my Papa. After some
time, God worked in Papa’s heart and he got changed. Finally he
believed in Jesus and in this way our whole family was now
following Jesus Christ. However, slowly many questions again
started troubling Papa and our neighbors also started ridiculing
him in the name of religious conversion etc. He would get upset
by such things.
When we started believing in true and living God (who was, who
is and will remain forever) through Jesus Christ, we found him
faithful in everything. Papa’s work became stable and my bhaiya
also got a good job. Likewise, many of our material needs were
met by God’s grace and we go TV, computer, motorcycle etc. God
started filling us with all kind of blessing spiritual and
material. People started suspecting that we had changed our
religion and had taken money in lieu of this. We would become
sad by hearing such things but would laugh them out. God had
given us a peace which was not disturbed now anymore with
anything, and this is what we were looking for, for many years.
None of our efforts but our faith in Jesus Christ brought this
peace (as he promised that he would give his peace, which no
fame, no money, no beauty, no relationships and/or material need
of this world can offer). Bible says that Jesus is the prince of
peace and true peace can be obtained only through him. We have
tasted and experienced this truth.
Now there was another thing which started troubling my mummy –
how would Aarti get married? Now we don’t do any idol worship
etc so if she gets married in a hindu family who still does the
same, it would be a big problem for Aarti. She did not have
answers so she would just pray with these questions in her
heart. After some time, God helped us to meet a family who had
come in Christian faith from Jain family. This was the divine
plan of God and undoubtedly both our families were happy with
this union.
Persecution
As soon as
our relatives came to know that the talks of my marriage were in
progress, they thought that I was getting married to a
traditional Christian. This confusion brought them all (my
dadiji, tauji, chachaji etc) to our house overnight. A big crowd
gathered at our house and they started interrogating us about
the temple of our house etc. We told them about our faith in
Jesus Christ so they all came in opposition. They stayed in our
house for a week and kept on pressurizing us for re-conversion
to Hinduism (which we did not convert though – we had changed
our hearts and turned from our unrighteousness, not religion).
They wanted us to do idol worship again. God gave us strength to
tell them our last and final decision to follow Christ at all
price.
Hearing this, they
started forcing more and even to the extent that they started
abusing us and threatening us of our murder. They ridiculed us.
They would stay in our house and do all sort of things. We were
pushed to a corner in our own house. We could not understand why
all this was happening with us; however, God gave us strength by
his Word in such times too. These were the times where we were
unable to go to the church, nor anyone from the church could
come to meet us, only God was our fortress, our strength and our
peace.
One day they all
decided to take me and mummy to Delhi forcefully. Papa objected
to this but still they managed to take us along almost in a
kidnapping sequence. They made several plans for next 7-8 days
of forcing us to do idol worship and getting me married to an
unbeliever person. God spoke to Papa in Jaipur and next day he
was in Delhi to rescue us. Even after lot of resistance, he took
us back to Jaipur. As we reached Jaipur, our mamaji started
following all our activities like a detective, to make sure that
we were not going to Church or are not meeting with any
believers. They would stop us from going to Church and yet our
faith was not moved an inch shorter. This persecution had
increased our faith rather. They were so amazed about the fact
that how we had become so rigid that so much of their persistent
efforts could not change our hearts a bit. Many of them stayed
with us for long time persuading us, however, finally they all
left one by one back to their house and routine life. Only by
God’s strength, we kept on standing for our faith.
God’s protection and peace
After few
days, chachaji (Papa’s younger brother) wanted to come to our
house. His intentions were not good. He called up papa and asked
us to stay at home while he reaches. Though by his character,
papa knew that it could be something wrong, yet he invited him.
Mummy-papa was a little afraid too. This incident happened after
my marriage and so papa, mummy and bhaiya were at home. They
were waiting and all of a sudden, God put them all in a deep
sleep wherever they were sitting. Next day, they all woke up
from their respective places and were surprised about such a
sleep and also why chachaji did not turn up. Papa called him to
find out and inquired. Chachaji informed that he had come but
there were 7-8 big size man standing outside who would not allow
him to even touch the gate of the house, much less entering the
house.
Hearing this, mummy
papa and bhaiya’s fear was gone and they leaped with joy to
realize that God had sent his angels to protect them from harm.
All fear was completely gone and they thanked God. We had never
employed anyone for our security but our good God loves us so
much that he would not even allow anyone to touch us with bad
intentions. God’s love is so unique that who ever loves him can
rest assured that he will really never leaven them nor forsake
them. No one can touch you, as Bible says that if God is on our
side, who can be against us, who can harms us. In the right
time, I got married with Sunil Modi (from the jain family who
had believed in Jesus
Today I am
living a happy and blessed life with my husband and kids. We are
enjoying the loving fellowship of God everyday and everyday of
our life is filled with his grace, love and peace.
We know now that Jesus Christ
is the absolute truth. Salvation (moksha) can come only by faith
in Jesus Christ, the true and living God. You can also believe
in this peacemaker and sin-forgiving God for eternal life. It
does not matter, which religion you belong to, it does not
matter what you have done or how big sinner you are, you can
trust in him and he will save you. If you have felt encouraged
by my life testimony, do contact us. May God bless you as per
your faith.
If you have
started believing in Jesus now and want to accept him as your
personal savior and Lord, please pray the following prayer with
all your heart –
“Lord Jesus, today I have come to know that you are living
God who forgive sins, gives true peace and hear your saints cry.
I repent of all my sins today and I pray that kindly forgive my
sins and be my savior. Please grant me your peace and life. I
completely trust in you and give my life to you, please take
control of my life today onwards. Help me in walking on your
ways, living by your Word. I thank you for listening to me now.
In Jesus name I ask you all this. Amen.”
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